"What's it like to grieve?"

by Natascha Krause
(Wichita, KS)

I wrote this in 2004 after my fiance', Rick, passed away. I wrote it because people kept telling me they "understand what i'm going through" and I didn't know how to tell them that they didn't.
Maybe it will help someone understand what they are feeling. I truly hope so...

It's so hard to describe what it feels like to grieve
But I'll do my best to explain
The emptiness inside is hard to conceive
Then there's the unbearable pain
It starts with the shock of instant change
Simple thoughts can't seem to get through
Your mind won't allow you to comprehend
the tragedy that's happened to you
Next, reality starts creeping in
It flows through your body and soul
You'll want it to stop but it will not end
You no longer have any control
Now is when the tears start to fall
You won't believe how much you can cry
Never in your life have you felt so small
Or had so many questions "why?"
In the meantime, the pain is absolutely unreal
It completely rips you apart
It's the most devastating pain you'll ever feel
It leaves you damaged with a shattered heart
This is when the healing starts to begin
Of course you'll never believe that's true
Somehow, someway, your body starts to mend
Your inner strength finds a way to break through
Now the tears may stop falling quite as much
You may even feel something again
Maybe you'll want to feel someone's touch
Or just make a call to a friend
It's so hard to describe what it feels like to grieve
For no one is it ever the same
But while you go through it
Please try to believe
You can survive all the heartache and pain....

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