The Prize by C.J. Couvillion

by C.J. Couvillion
(Baton Rouge, Louisiana)

My son Stephen Couvillion died unexpectedly on April 25th, 2010, in Philadelphia, PA. He was a 29-yr old graduate student at Temple University at the time. The autopsy report and subsequent ruling of his death by the medical examiner was "accidental drug intoxication." I started writing about his life and death and its impact on the lives of our family in September, 2010, and wrote "The Prize" on November 30th. This piece is part of a compilation which I have entitled, "Nightmare to Normal," currently an unpulished manuscript.

The Prize

SON came and went as we fell in tears, but he was not the one to blame, his hurt and pain in body for years, were much too much to hold and bear, his MOTHER bathed by torrents of tears, just could not bear to view him there, wrapped in plastic sheets so cold, with hair of curls and eyes of gauze, her screams were heard by all so clear, as FATHER and friend both stood around, to hold her up and keep her still, she bent low down to kiss his face, to say goodbye to such a son, who loved so much yet hurt so bad, and could not stay till life was done.

A MOTHER’S love is such a thing, that moves the earth to make a way, for child to learn and enjoy play, and sing and dance and live life full, and grow to be a man who can, with all his strength hold to the woman who, gave him life and breath and hope, and lived for him and gave her all, and found him to be such a joy, but knew his body could not last, but kept on putting all to task, who would not see the good in him, or give him aid or just befriend, or love him like she thought all should, while knowing he could go at once, but always taking another chance.

A FATHER cannot ever know, how his own son should come or go, but give to GOD’S own loving hand, the boy who thus became a man, for love is not a thing defined, but giving free to let him shine, and letting go so he can grow, and make mistakes and to become, what his own GOD would have him be, to work to make a life and home, which all one day would have become, a place for FATHER to rest his head, and lay life down and soon be dead, but it was not to be this plan, for SON took leave to GOD’s right hand, and left this earth to become MAN.

For MAN was made to fly and soar, though freedom paid its ugly price, because of one who from a tree, lied to GOD’S prizes you and me, we were put out from Eden there, to work and slave and grow and save, but all the while MAN knew otherwise, that he was made to be The Prize, to GOD’S own eyes to bring delight, and cause the angels to take flight; so take heed now who think you know, for GOD’S own SON He did not spare, nor did He mine so can you bear, to let your SON also go, for GOD indeed may call him home, who lives far off before life is done, to be The Prize all were to be, because ONE hung upon the Tree.

For we are what he has made us, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand to be our way of life. (Ephesians 2:10)

Comments for The Prize by C.J. Couvillion

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Jul 06, 2011
The Prize
by: Janelle

Thanks C.J. for sharing this piece from your own journey after the loss of your son. I'm sure others will find your writings meaningful and helpful as well.

I'm glad that writing was so healing for you. Keep sharing.

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