From Dispare to find peace

by Krieks Brink
(Middelburg, Mpumalanga)

I'm krieks brink. Losing my baby through an accident and try to make sense of his death is not an easy road.

I don't think I will ever heal or feel normal again. Every song of love ones I hear I think of him. I can't open myself for more emotions or relationships except for my twin boys. I'm only coping day by day. needless to say me and my husband divorcing now.

My son Ian was my youngest, his two brothers is twins and two years older than him. From his birth we enjoyed and treasure him. He was the only one of my kids that spend most of his free time with me.

One Thursday ( on a holiday ) they went braaiing at the local dam. About 22h30 he want a lift with one of his friends on a bike. They his a loose rock in the road and lost control. My son didn't wore a helmet. My other son phone me an tell me to come and be quick their was an accident. I was the first person there with first aid, so I had to do first aid on my own dying son. Two hours later that night he passed away due to brain bleeding.

There is no words or feeling I can describe to explain how I felt and what my actions was for several minutes there after.

He was twenty years old, so much to live for, so huge potential. He was one of the brightest kids I've ever seen.

Somebody told me his in a better place (HOW CAN THEY SAY ANYWHERE ELSE IS A BETTER PLACE, I WANT HIM HERE WITH ME!!!!!). NOBODY on earth can love him more than I!!!!!!. Two years is a long time to be without him.

Some days I want to go to him, but I know by doing that I will left my twin boys behind, and they need me just like I need them.

Comments for From Dispare to find peace

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Oct 11, 2015
Ian my darling son 6 years in heaven
by: krieks brink

My darling son it is 6 years now. The missing and longing is still as real and deep as 6 years ago. You are an uncle of 2 nieces and 1 nepfew and one on the way, you shall adore them. My baby I love you dearly and always will. Your ever longing mother

Apr 11, 2012
still miss you
by: krieks

Ian I still miss you, the missing will never stop. Iwish you were here. You are an uncle of gourgage little princess niece, who is 9 months old, Her name is Melissa. Love Your ever longing mother.

Jan 16, 2012
Your Son
by: Anonymous

I Am truly sorry for your Loss A Mother is not suppose to Bury her Child
And Yes your Son is with you Every Day & watching over you & your Twins
They need you GodBless & watch over you all

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