by Richard John Scarr
At first I was completely stunned.
As though walking in a daze.
I could not accept that you were gone.
But gradually, I left that phase.
Then came pain and heartache.
Everything had ceased to be.
For when God took you from my side.
He took my World away from me!
At night I'd cry myself to sleep.
As I lay in deep despair.
With my hand upon your pillow.
But of course, you were not there.
Anger followed. And even rage!
Because I had been left alone.
Angry at God for taking you.
Angry you had left me on my own.
Next came guilt. And small things grew,
out of all proportion in my head.
And I asked for your forgiveness.
For those things I had done and said.
And everywhere I ventured,
held memories of you.
And though I tried to close my mind.
Still thoughts of you came flooding through.
So I found myself avoiding,
places we'd enjoyed for years.
For I knew that if I went there.
I'd have to leave again, in tears.
It takes time to ease an aching heart.
But slowly we come through.
And though I've accepted you are gone.
I can't stop missing, or stop loving you.